And the award goes to ...

[tripperfunster]

Saturday a customer comes into our store, carrying a little rodent in his hands. (I wasn't at work this day, so this is what I'm to understand.) He wants to buy some food for this rodent, and when the girls ask him what it is, he says it's a mouse and he found it under a bridge.

The girls say it looked more like a vole . It jumped out of his hands and ran across the counter where it was caught and given back to him.

I'm no zoologist, but picking up strange rodents and walking around with them in your hands is practically an invitation for rabies or the hantivirus or something. Whatever, it takes all kinds.

On Sunday I DID work, and this fellow was back in the store with his vole. Except it didn't run around on the counter. It didn't run around at all. He just held it in his hand, and it lay there, kind of curled up, and honestly? It looked dead. It was pouring rain outside, and the thing was soaked, so I thought … Whatevs. Maybe it's just sick? I dunno. The guy told some story about how when McDonalds told him he couldn't bring his (dead) rodent in the restaurant, he had a hissy fit and swore at them and threw his drink on the ground. Nice guy.

On TUESDAY the guy was back, and I didn't have to look at the vole to know it was dead. You could SMELL the decay. Ugh! It was sort of bloated and greasy looking, and I'm no Medical Examiner, but this thing was dead. LONG dead. The guy wanted a cage for his pet, and also a water bottle. But he didn't want his pet to have to stretch up to reach the bottle. ? Probably not an issue, KWIM?

I felt kind of bad taking his money, but I also remember his hissy fit story, so I also didn't really want to piss him off. To be clear, if he wasn't holding a dead vole, I wouldn't have thought him to be terribly strange. A bit odd, perhaps, but not completely fucked up, and certainly not mentally challenged. When he went to pay for his cage, he put the vole on the counter and it made a little 'thump'. I gently said "Uh … are you sure he's okay? He doesn't really look okay to me."

"Oh no, he's fine!" says the guy, "He just sleeps during the day."

Yeah.

He was back today. With his vole. I wasn't there, but apparently it doesn't smell anymore. It's just starting to … mummify? I wonder if he'll keep bringing it back when it's just bones? He bought some hamster tubes, so his pet can run through them and have fun. The girls gently asked AGAIN if his pet was feeling okay, and he said that it was.

I would almost think we're being Punk'd, but I seriously doubt any actor would agree to carry around a decaying rodent.

Comments

[mab.livejournal.com]

OMG! What a bizarre situation. Very, very odd.

[ravenna-c-tan.livejournal.com]

Wow. That's... wow.

For one of the all time best "I don't think that animal is doing very well" veterinary stories you have to listen to the audio clip of Kevin Fitzgerald on NPR's Wait, Wait, Don't Tell me. He's a former roadie for the Rolling Stones who went to vet school and is now a vet in Colorado, and his segment on the show is just classic:

http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=131619471

(Audio)

[amberdreams.livejournal.com]

That is just the weirdest thing and to be honest, totally creepy. I hope he doesn't live with anyone - and if he does maybe someone should check THEY are still alive and he hasn't got some sort of Bates Motel situation going on...!!!!

[amanuensis1.livejournal.com]

This is...No. I can't even think what it is.

[akatnamedeaster.livejournal.com]

Geez, lets hope next time he doesn't bring his mother shopping with him, eh?

And you do realize you now need to do a variation on this:



when he comes in again.

[tripperfunster.livejournal.com]

Yes. One that I'm not exactly sure what to do about. There is obviously something fundamentally wrong with him, but as long as he's not hurting anyone, I'm not sure what my role is in this.

[tripperfunster.livejournal.com]

I will have to check that out thanks!

[tripperfunster.livejournal.com]

:D That is exactly what we were saying at work. The dead vole is probably a pet for his dead wife!

Super creepy!

[tripperfunster.livejournal.com]

I honestly don't know what it is either. There is honestly NOW WAY a person with sight and smell and touch could not figure out this thing was dead.

[tripperfunster.livejournal.com]

It's like that skit, but in reverse. As a pet store owner, I am MORE than familiar with that skit. ;)

[facecat.livejournal.com]

Wow. If you have an adult protective agency in town maybe you could notify them. Sounds like he needs some help/supervision.

[foxestacado.livejournal.com]

I agree with comments that he needs some help/supervision. I mean, you don't *have* to, you're not compelled to do anything in this case, I don't think, because he's not harming anyone it seems (although I don't know the laws in your area). But he might not be functional in other ways. And who knows if he has a dead wife/family member at home too.

This is such a bizarre story. Hmm. I might share this story with my clinical supervisor, but I'm betting she will just think the same: get protective services involved.

[nic]

!!!!!!!!!

I have no words.

[magically25.livejournal.com]

Sorry I probably shouldn't but I cried laughing

[chocolate-frapp.livejournal.com]

I would think dead rodents would fit right in at McDonalds.

[tripperfunster.livejournal.com]

I looked into it. We don't. :(

[tripperfunster.livejournal.com]

I called city services, and we don't have any adult based protection agencies. We DO have some sort of Vulnerable Persons thing through the police, and they said that if he comes in again I should call them.

I'm really not sure what to do. He obviously needs help in some way, but I am wary of having the poor guy hauled away and his whole life disrupted on my account. Ugh. Why is rl not as clear cut as stuff in the movies?

I'll try to get some info out of him the next time he's in. Where he lives, if he's alone, etc. It might be a bit different if someone comes by his place, as opposed to having the cops show up while he's in our store.

[tripperfunster.livejournal.com]

It is mind bogglingly odd, for sure.

[tripperfunster.livejournal.com]

It is by far the oddest customer story I've ever had.

[tripperfunster.livejournal.com]

Maybe they didn't want the competition?

[chocolate-frapp.livejournal.com]

LOL
come to think of it, Charlie Sheen and Mel Gibson are both batshit crazy enough to carry dead rodents around....

[fireflavored.livejournal.com]

I...what...??? :D

The way you wrote this is so funny, that I'm actually crying through the laughter and horror. I've had some intense customer service moments, but this is at the top of the scale! What the hell does one do?!?!

[tripperfunster.livejournal.com]

Yes, this definitely tops the list of odd. I really don't want take advantage of him and take his money, but I also do not want to be the person to burst his bubble and introduce him to reality. *shrug*

[fireflavored.livejournal.com]

God, no. That bubble may be keeping you safe!

[demicus.livejournal.com]

Well, it IS rather difficult to stretch up to reach a water bottle when you're dead. Good to know that he cared enough to buy the very best for his smelly little/not smelly but mummified "long dead" friend. You have the best customers. Ever. Really.