OMG I am picky and spoiled and can no longer enjoy most fanfiction.

[tripperfunster]

*flails*

I've just back buttoned on three fics. Three fics that were RECOMMENDED on the Avengers search sites. All three sounded intruiging and all three lost me in the first two paragraphs by overexplaining stuff (Tony had just returned from Tokyo Japan) Really? Not Tokyo Omaha?

Using pet names He wanted to surprise his lover. He had been away and had missed his lover. I don't know why 'lover' bugs me so much, but it does. I guess, unless I was having a torrid affair, I would never refer to someone as my 'lover.' How about he just missed Steve? Even if it was "since they'd become lovers," or something, but UGH. rant rant rant.

And finally, the dreaded epithet (which I guess 'lover' would qualify), "The Man from World War 2". Yes, they called him that. As in, "The man from world war two crossed the room and walked into the elevator."


*cries* These might actually be great fics, but I will never be able to enjoy them. I've become a fic!snob.

I might be able to stomach some of these things say ... a couple of chapters in, but all of these things happened in the first couple of paragraphs.

I also hate it when someone mentally referrs to their mate as their 'husband'. I guess it's for the same reasons as 'lover'. Partly is feels like the writer is screaming I BELIEVE IN MARRIAGE EQUALITY (which, of course, I do too, but it feels odd and forced to me) and partly because I never think of my husband as my 'husband.

I don't think : "Hey, I wonder if my husband is home." I wonder if LANCE is home. I often refer to him as my husband when I'm talking to other people (who don't know him well,) as in: "Yes, my husband is also very tall." but I never think to MYSELF, Gosh, my husband is so tall. I think that LANCE is so tall.

COMFORT ME WITH OTHER THINGS YOU AND I BOTH HATE TOGETHER. And I'll tell my HUSBAND/LOVER/THE MAN WHO WAS NOT IN WORLD WAR 2 ABOUT IT.

Comments

[tripperfunster.livejournal.com]

:D Well, speaking two languages is a fantastic excuse!

Epithets are never good. Don't say "The blond man" or "The brunette man" or God Forbid "The shorter brunette oncologist." :D

Snape, Harry, Steve, Tony. JUST USE THE NAMES!

And don't feel too bad, because I HAVE USED THESE THINGS TOO! I look back at early fic and CRINGE. :D

I guess it's like crawling before you learn to walk. We all seem to have to take those steps in the same way and fall down a few times. :D

Also, there are people out there who don't hate that stuff. I am not one of them .;) (But I love YOU, dear!!)

[sra-danvers.livejournal.com]

Is my third language, but I don't speak perfectly any of them XD

The problem is in Spanish we use so many synonyms because we don't use to repeat names. It sounds strange to me ^^

I'm not crawling, I'm creeping like a worm XD Just thanks to my betas is readable XD

[tripperfunster.livejournal.com]

What's the third language? And honey, there are tons of Americans (and Canadians) that only speak one language and do a total SHIT job of it! :D

I'm sure synonyms are just fine in Spanish, just not in MY English fic. ;D

<3

[sra-danvers.livejournal.com]

Català, from Catalonia. You know, Barcelona. We want to be a country, divorcing from Spain XD
And I speak a bit of French. I love French, I love France ^^ I love Canada too! Just not Spain :-P

[schemingreader.livejournal.com]

Shorter brunette oncologist!

hahahahah

[chocolate-frapp.livejournal.com]

yeah, we know who that is, don't we?

[schemingreader.livejournal.com]

Oh... I don't. I feel left out! Hospital AU? I am in the middle of writing one. Hope when I refer to Tony as the shorter brunet bearded research director it won't be perceived as derivative.

[chocolate-frapp.livejournal.com]

I meant Wilson on House. sorry, didn't mean to embarrass you.

[tripperfunster.livejournal.com]

Yes, Wilson, from the show House. There is a frightening number of fics that include " The older diagnostician shook his head at the younger, brunette oncologist." I wish I were kidding.

As for Tony, it should be Shorter Brunet GOATEED billionaire, playboy, philathropist, research director.

Oh man, now I just want to write a crack fic!!

[schemingreader.livejournal.com]

The wild-eyed genius brunet with the dimples at the corners of his mouth. (I have a weird obsession with the kissing at the corner of the mouth thing...)

[sara-the-lazy.livejournal.com]

"The man from World War 2?" Seriously?

I'm in the "I'm ok with a few choice epithets" camp - "lover" and "husband" wouldn't bother me for example, and I admit to using "lover" and "boyfriend" in my own writing nowadays (then again it's RPs and not written for public consumption really). In my own writing for posting, I use names a lot, used to use more epithets than I do now. At least I never called someone with black hair "the raven" though XD... Sometimes I've used JUST names but when I do that sometimes it feels like name overkill. Even though I've been told epithets are bad, it's hard to just use names... May change back to completely removing epithets though since that's what more people tend to prefer to read. Even though it feels weird to me. Hm.

[sara-the-lazy.livejournal.com]

OH, this epithet stuff is for narrative, not for people referring to each other in their heads - usually (once there was an emphasis on boyfriend because it was such a new wonderful thing that they were each other's boyfriends). Just to clarify.