Im on yr flist spammin yr internets! :D

[tripperfunster]

Okay, final post for today. (can you tell it's raining and I'm bored? The kids are milling about, so I can't draw or do 'research' *wink wink* so I'm spamming you guys instead!

I have a silly pic of me from prophecy, and a question, for my lovely flist:

First, the pic:

joanwilder aka Raewhit bought me a lovely gift. I opened the box and was like...WTF? I'm not terribly schooled in the land of smex toys, (aside from my trusty vibrator "Big Red",) but when I took them out, it became apparant. NIPPLE CLAMPS!

I, of course, had to get a pic with them! (and check out my kewl Snarry shirt!)








The question is...

What are your silly pet peeves in fanfic? (or art, for that matter)?

I don't mean legitimate ones, like proper grammar and spelling, or correct use of the english language, but what are your 'back button' triggers? What silly thing pulls you out of a story?

One of mine, that I found today, while reading an otherwise very entertaining House/Wilson story was thus: SHELL I'm sorry, I know that it's perfectly acceptable, but I HATE it when someone calls someone's ear a shell, or "shell of his ear" etc. I don't know why, but it bugs the shit out of me.

Now, I didn't hit the back button for that, but the story lost it's momentum.

You??

Comments

[scarletscarlet.livejournal.com]

Clover clamps, innit? They're the prettiest :-)

(I like shell :). It makes me think of sunlight glowing through the roundy-bit on a big whelk-thing, warm and smooth)

Hrm. Things of bug... Although probably none of them will make me *stop* reading if the story is any good.

*Horrible diminutive nicknames, eg Sev/vie, Dray, Remy. Dray *kills* me.
*The word "normalcy" instead of "normality" - I know it's just an americanism, but it grates and pulls me out of the fic, because on seeing it my brain screams NORMALITY!! as a replacement.
*Character like Snape or Lucius using overly casual language
*Sometimes marriages weird me out in fic, if they seem contrived or the ultimate-end-goal of the relationship
*Love at first fuck *cough*Imayhavedonesomethinglikethis*cough* particularly when they're enemies or in an antagonistic situation eg captor/captive. Takes time, dammit!
*When Draco is "the blonde" and Harry "the brunet". Similarly, overuse of any of the following: onyx-eyed, raven-haired, obsidian-eyes, emerald-eyes, avada-kedavra-green-eyes, icy blue orbs, etc...
*Psycho screaming Ginny, evil money-grubbing Weasleys, unless it's somehow made plausible...
*Everybody Is Gay
*ohmygod, if Harry is actually the Lost Crown Prince of Awesomeland or More Pureblooded Than Thou, and that's somehow supposed to give him more credibility rather than being a great big flangsty millstone.
*OH MY GOD screaming orgasms all the time. This may be because I've never shagged a screamer, so it's a li'l hard to picture :).
*feminised Harry (etc). I don't mean genderfuck - that's fine and dandy - but when he's basically written as a teenage girl called Harry.

I should stop now, before I annoy everyone :). The list is only so long because I read so much, and love so many fics!

[tripperfunster.livejournal.com]

Lotus clamps, I'm told!

I HATE 'older man/younger man and blond/brunette etc. Or in House fic, THE ONCOLOGIST/DIAGNOSTICIAN! UUUURRG! That really pics my ass. (arse)

[(Anonymous)]

AMEN! Who the fuck thinks of their lover as "the oncologist" while they're having sex? I mean, every time I read something like "The oncologist fondled House" I get a mental picture of Wilson palpating House's chest and testicles for tumors. Not sexy.